Most sex toys can be used in a BDsM context, but there are some toys that work better for this purpose than others. When I’m selecting a toy to be used in a scene, I like to look for ones that have unique features such as interesting textures, powerful motors or beautiful design. In my book, the toys that are best suited for BDsM play are ones that can be used creatively, or which have an element that makes them intimidating in some way.
The Lush is a wearable vibrator that is controlled remotely with a mobile phone app. It’s great for D/s relationships where the submissive partner has a vagina. The dominant partner can instruct their sub to wear the Lush while they’re out at dinner, or at the movies or just around the house. They then have total control over the vibrator, being able to increase the vibrations with a touch of their finger. This toy is whisper quiet and perfect for exhibitionists and those who enjoy public play. The Lush isn’t suitable for anal play, but the Lovense Hush is a butt plug that works in exactly the same way.
The Hitachi Magic Wand is one of the most iconic sex toys on the planet. It’s extremely powerful and can be used on a range of genitals and body types. It’s gender neutral and rechargeable. The long handle makes it ideal for using in bondage scenes to lash it to your partners thigh or torso for hands-free stimulation. It’s ridiculously powerful so it’s great to use for forced orgasm or orgasm-denial play. And the utilitarian design are perfect if you’re into medical play.
Butt plugs are a mainstay of BDsM play. They can be used as a form of humiliation, in preparation for more intense anal play or for public play. A dominant may ask their submissive to wear a plug for a set amount of time as punishment or reward, and you can even rig a bondage harness to hold a plug in place. I like the Bootie plug for BDsM scenes because it’s really easy to insert and it’s comfortable to wear for an extended period of time. The elongated base nestles snugly between your cheeks, unlike plugs with round or square bases which put a lot of pressure around the anus.
The Icicles range are ideal for temperature play. The glass can be heated up or cooled down to create unique sensations when they’re placed against the skin. There are a huge range of sizes, colours and textures to choose from and they’re all pleasing to the eye. They’re also a tiny bit intimidating because they’re glass, which is both rock-hard and has an element of danger to it.
This behemoth of a dildo is inspired by Drax from Guardians of the Galaxy. It is a medium-density silicone with incredible raised textures. It is also one of the most intimidating toys I own. I am yet to review Dix the Destroyer but it is a toy I love to play with. It’s perfect for creating an element of dread and anticipation in a sub. It’s harness compatible and great for size queens. It is definitely a toy that requires a warm-up if you intend to use it for penetration. It’s also fun to show to a sub before blindfolding them and penetrating with a smaller toy, allowing them to imagine that it’s this giant dildo that they’re playing with. Dix is definitely a toy that plays with the mind, which is a huge part of what BDsM is all about.
Do you have any favourite toys for BDsM play? Do you have any questions about using toys during scenes? If so, leave me a comment below.