The Feeldoe is one of the weirder looking toys in my toybox. It resembles what I imagine a boomerang made out of a cock would look like. But the value of the Feeldoe goes far beyond it’s appearance, and it’s a surprising and versatile toy.
The Feeldoe is Tantus’s patented “strapless strap-on”. The idea is that a person with a vagina can insert the short bulb end into their vagina and hold it in place with their pelvic floor muscles. They then have a cock that they can use to penetrate their partner without having to fiddle with harnesses. I loved the idea of a strapless strap-on, because although I don’t mind wearing a harness for strap-on play, there was something very intimate about the idea of not needing one, of being able to be completely naked while still wearing a strap-on. Another reason that I was drawn to this toy is that I felt it would solve the issue I have with the lack of biofeedback during strap-on sex. See, when you’re having sex with a strap on, you don’t have the same level of sensation as you would if the toy were actually a part of your body. And so I thought that having a portion of the toy inside me would make it a more pleasurable experience.
After a few tries to use the Feeldoe for it’s intended purpose, I was ready to give up. As a strapless strap-on, I feel that the Feeldoe fails woefully for a couple of reasons. Firstly, once the toy is inserted, it juts out at a strange angle from my body. The stem that holds the bulb end onto the toy is very flexible and the dildo is quite heavy, which causes the cock to bob about wildly when you move. It makes it difficult to penetrate your partner, to thrust or change positions during sex because the whole unit just feels wobbly and insecure. In order to give the toy some stability, I have to stand with my thighs squeezed together to hold it in place. Not only is this not a very sexy position, but it is damn hard to thrust when you’ve got your legs held tightly against each other. I’m afraid that my partner will think I need to pee, or am indulging in a mid-coital Time Warp break.
The other reason the Feeldoe doesn’t work well for me is that it just doesn’t want to stay in position. See, the funny thing about vaginas is that when they get aroused, they become wetter, more slippery and more open. And those three factors are disastrous when you’re trying to hold a slick silicone bulb inside yourself while pleasing a partner. I’m convinced that Xena is the only woman with kegel muscles strong enough to hold this toy in place long enough to fuck her partner with it. The only way this toy really stays in place is if the person wearing it is lying or sitting and the partner who is being penetrated mounts them. Which is very fun, but somewhat limiting if you can only use it in certain positions.
On their website, Tantus suggest using a harness with this toy if you have trouble keeping it in place or if you want more support. Which is fine, but entirely defeats the purpose of a strapless strap on.
So as a strapless strap-on, the Feeldoe really missed the mark for me. But that doesn’t mean that it’s a bad toy at all! In fact, I think it’s an amazing toy with several very versatile uses.
Firstly, as a regular dildo it freaking rules. It’s a nice, firm silicone, it’s got a lovely curve and the pronounced head is wonderful for g-spot play. It’s also safe for anal play, and the super smooth texture makes it great for going in the back door. It’s also not terribly thick, but nice and long which makes for a very satisfying anal experience if you’re exploring depth rather than width.
The most surprising use for this toy came to me while I was reading this comic by Shelby Criswell for Oh Joy Sex Toy. In the comic, the author talks about how the Feeldoe opened up a world of masturbation for him by allowing him to masturbate with a penis that feels like it’s part of his body. When I read that, I had to give this a try. Now, I’ve never fantasised about having a penis, and I don’t have any kind of dysphoria around my genitals so I can’t speak about those experiences. But what I can tell you is that the Feeldoe is an amazing masturbatory tool for people with vaginas. Once the bulb end is inserted, you can jerk the dildo end as though you were masturbating a penis. The inserted bulb provides internal stimulation on the g-spot and the ridges on the inner shaft generate friction and pressure against the clitoris. The result is an explosive orgasm that was different to any I’ve had before. It was a bit of a mind-fuck to be jerking off with a penis, but it was a seriously hot experience.
I definitely recommend the Feeldoe for anyone who has dreamed of having a penis, or for trans men who are finding it difficult to navigate masturbation with a vagina. I can see the Feeldoe being an incredible tool for healing and empowerment for people who have felt dysphoria around their vagina by offering the opportunity to feel like you’ve got a penis of your own, and derive pleasure from that experience. If you’re looking for a more realistic version, Tantus also make the Reeldoe, which is a flesh-toned Feeldoe with life-like features (although sadly, it only comes in one shade).
The Feeldoe also features a cavity at the bottom of the toy which can fit a vibrating bullet. I never use this because the vibrations don’t carry well through the toy and it just gives me the feeling of an itch I can’t scratch.
The Feeldoe is made of glossy, firm silicone which feels super smooth and is easy to clean. It also comes in a variety of different shapes and sizes, including the Feeldoe More, the Feeldoe Slim and the Feeldoe Stout. Each version comes in only one colour, which is a bit of a bummer but I do love the royal purple hue of my Feeldoe.
It’s difficult for me to give a definitive ruling on the Feeldoe. For it’s intended purpose as a strapless strap-on, it misses the mark by a mile. But as a stand-alone dildo it’s excellent. Best of all, I feel like it’s a really unique toy that offers the opportunity for people with vaginas to experience masturbating with a penis. The Feeldoe is a toy that opens the door to pleasure for trans men who have felt uncomfortable or dysphoric touching their genitals and I think it has the potential to be a tool for healing and exploration, which is an excellent thing.